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Do We Really Need All Those Pre-Wedding Events?

Congratulations, you’re getting married! As an engaged couple, you’ve probably started planning exciting pre-wedding events to celebrate this joyous occasion with friends and family. But in the midst of choosing flowers, booking photographers, and finding the perfect venue, have you stopped to wonder if you really need all those pre-wedding events?

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In Malaysia, lavish pre-wedding celebrations have become the norm. Engagement parties, bridal showers, rehearsal dinners, and bachelor or bachelorette weekends are common. While these events are meant to spread the festivities and bring loved ones together to honor the bride and groom, they also add extra stress, time commitments, and costs in the months leading up to the big day.

As a modern couple focused on what matters, do you need to follow all these lavish traditions? Or can you create your own simplified pre-wedding journey and stay focused on what’s most important: your loving relationship and the true meaning of marriage? You have the freedom to choose what events feel right for you as a couple and set boundaries to avoid being swept up in costly celebrations that don’t align with your values. Your real happily ever after begins with the wedding itself, not all the partying and pomp that comes before it.

Pre-Wedding Events in Malaysia: An Overview

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Malaysia is known for extravagant pre-wedding events and photo shoots. As a bride and groom, you’ll likely face pressure from family and friends to participate in these traditions. But are they really necessary? Let’s look at some of the popular pre-wedding events in Malaysia to help you decide.

Pre-Wedding Photoshoot

The pre-wedding photoshoot, or “prewed”, has become almost mandatory. You dress up in your wedding outfits and pose for a professional photographer who captures artistic shots of the two of you looking blissfully in love. While prewed photos make great social media fodder and wedding decor, a simple photoshoot with your photographer on the wedding day can achieve the same purpose.

Door Games

Door games originate from Chinese culture and involve a series of challenges for the groom to overcome before he can enter the bride’s house. Tasks like answering questions about the bride, giving gifts, and performing silly stunts are common. Door games are meant to be lighthearted and fun but can end up causing unnecessary stress for an already nervous groom!

Tea Ceremony

The tea ceremony allows you to serve tea to your close friends and relatives as a sign of respect and to share your good fortune. Guests will give you red packets of money or jewellery in return. While a tea ceremony is a meaningful cultural tradition for many Malaysian Chinese couples, it ultimately comes down to your preferences and how much you value such rituals.

At the end of the day, you should only do what feels right for you as a couple. Don’t feel pressured into following lavish pre-wedding customs to please others or for the sake of tradition. Focus on what really matters – your marriage and new life together!

The Most Popular Pre-Wedding Events and Traditions

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If you’re planning a wedding in Malaysia, you’re in for a treat with all the fun pre-wedding events and traditions! While not technically required, these celebrations are a memorable way to bond with friends and family before the big day.

The Engagement Party

An engagement party is a chance to announce your exciting news to everyone and celebrate this new chapter of your lives together! Host a casual get-together with drinks, snacks and games where guests can toast the happy couple.

The Bridal Shower

A bridal shower lets the bride’s close friends and family members shower her with gifts to help prepare for married life. Play classic shower games, open presents, enjoy tea and cake, and laugh over memories with the people who know you best.

The Bachelor/Bachelorette Party

For one last wild night out before settling down, the bachelor/bachelorette party is a must! Go bar hopping, hit up a comedy club, plan a weekend getaway – do whatever suits you and your crew. Just promise not to share any incriminating photos afterwards!

While pre-wedding events require extra planning, the memories you make will last forever. Focus on surrounding yourself with your favorite people, keep things lighthearted, and be fully present in each moment. Before you know it, your wedding day will be here – so enjoy this special time and all the celebrations along the way! With an enthusiastic, energetic and cheerful attitude, your pre-wedding events are sure to be a blast.

The Pros and Cons of Common Pre-Wedding Events

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The pre-wedding events are meant to celebrate the journey towards your big day, but are they really necessary? There are some pros and cons to consider for the most common events.

Engagement Party

An engagement party allows you to announce your exciting news to family and friends! It’s a chance for loved ones to congratulate you in person. However, it requires time, money, and planning when you’re just starting to organize the wedding. If keeping things simple, you could skip the engagement party and announce your news on social media or with phone calls instead.

Bridal Shower

A bridal shower lets the women in your life shower you with gifts to help you start your new home. It’s a fun, meaningful chance for bonding between the bride and her close ones. On the other hand, showers mean creating another guest list, choosing decor, games and treats which adds to an already long to-do list. If you prefer less fuss, suggest guests donate to your honeymoon fund or charity instead of a traditional shower.

Bachelor/Bachelorette Party

Your last night of “freedom” should be a blast, right? Bachelor(ette) parties are a chance to cut loose with your closest pals. However, they require extensive planning, can be expensive, and may encourage excessive drinking or risky behaviour. As an alternative, you could have a co-ed pre-wedding party with games, snacks, and moderate drinking to celebrate in a safer way.

Rehearsal Dinner

A rehearsal dinner is an opportunity to thank your wedding party and close family the night before the wedding. It allows out-of-town guests to meet and mingle in a casual setting. The downside is that it’s yet another event to organize and budget for during an already expensive time. If preferred, you could host an informal welcome party, meet and greet, or invite your wedding party for a thank-you dinner instead.

The pre-wedding events are meant to be enjoyable and optional. Choose the ones that matter most to you and your partner, then customize or skip the rest. Your wedding journey should be memorable for all the right reasons! Focus on what counts – your commitment to one another, surrounded by your most cherished friends and family.

Creating a Customized Pre-Wedding Plan for Your Needs

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Congratulations, you’re getting married! While pre-wedding events are exciting, they can also feel overwhelming with so many options. The key is choosing what matters most to you as a couple.

You do not have to do everything! Focus on meaningful events that reflect your relationship and culture. A romantic sunset picnic where you had your first date? Or a traditional tea ceremony to honour your heritage?

Once you decide on must-haves, set a budget and timeline. Estimate costs for venues, catering, outfits and more. See what fits, then allocate money and time accordingly. Don’t blow your entire budget on a lavish engagement party if you still need to pay for the wedding!

Delegate when possible. Ask friends and family to help plan and host events. They’ll be thrilled to support you, and it reduces your workload. Let them choose and organize an event within your guidelines. Provide a guest list, budget, and theme, then trust them to handle the details.

Most importantly, enjoy this special time in your lives! While pre-wedding events are meant to celebrate your love and upcoming marriage with others, celebrate privately together. Go on dates, express your feelings, laugh and live in the moment. The pre-wedding events will come and go, but your love and memories will last forever.

Choose what pre-wedding traditions mean the most to you as a couple, set a realistic plan to make it happen, accept help from loved ones and appreciate each moment – that is the key to creating a perfect, customized pre-wedding experience for your needs. Make the events a reflection of your unique relationship and what really matters. The rest will fall into place!

Pre-Wedding Events: Planning The Party Before The Wedding

Tips for Streamlining Your Pre-Wedding Schedule

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Congratulations, you’re engaged! Now comes the fun (and stressful) part—planning the wedding. While pre-wedding events like engagement parties, bridal showers and bachelor/bachelorette parties are all the rage, they’re not for everyone. If your schedule is packed or you’re on a tight budget, don’t feel obligated to do every little thing. Focus on what really matters to you as a couple.

Streamline your schedule

Pick and choose what events are important for you and your fiance to attend. If friends offer to host additional parties, politely decline or ask if you can combine events. For example, have a joint bridal shower/bachelor party. Your true friends will understand if you can’t make it to everything.

  • Say “no” more often. It’s your wedding, you get to decide! Learn the power of a polite but firm “no, thank you”.
  • Keep guest lists small. Only invite your closest friends and family to pre-wedding events. Keeping numbers low will reduce costs and stress.
  • Make events casual. Rather than a formal sit-down dinner, opt for a casual cocktail party or BBQ. Your guests will appreciate the laid-back vibe too.
  • Combine events where possible. Ask friends if they’d be open to a joint bridal shower and bachelor/bachelorette party. Two parties for the price of one!
  • Keep your schedule light the week of the wedding. Don’t plan any pre-wedding events the week of your wedding. You’ll want to be well-rested to enjoy this special time.
  • Take time for yourself. Make sure to schedule downtime for you and your fiance. Go for a couples massage, walk together or cuddle up for a movie night at home. Your relationship should be the top priority during this busy time.

Staying organized and learning to delegate when possible will help reduce stress. Focus on what matters—celebrating your love and commitment to each other. The rest are just details. Congratulations again!


You’re finally getting married – congratulations! While pre-wedding events are supposed to be fun, do you really need so many of them? With your wedding just around the corner, you have so much planning and preparation to do. Feel free to have an engagement party, bachelor/bachelorette party, rehearsal dinner, and more, especially if it will just add extra stress. Focus on what really matters to you as a couple. If pre-wedding events feel more like chores than celebrations, skip them! Your wedding day is about you, so do only what will make you happy and allow you to be fully present. Say no to what you don’t need and yes to what you do. You’ll be walking down the aisle before you know it, so enjoy this special time and make the most of it – your way!


Common pre-wedding events include engagement parties, bridal showers, rehearsal dinners, and bachelor or bachelorette parties. These events are often organized to celebrate the upcoming wedding.

Pre-wedding events provide opportunities for couples to celebrate with friends and family before the wedding. They can also help build excitement and create lasting memories.

No, it’s okay to have all these pre-wedding events. Couples should choose the events that align with their preferences, values, and budgets. They can skip events that feel overwhelming or unnecessary.

Couples can streamline their pre-wedding schedule by selectively choosing the events that matter most to them. They can also combine events, keep guest lists small, and make events more casual to reduce stress and costs.

The key takeaway is that couples have the freedom to choose pre-wedding events that suit their needs and desires. They should focus on what truly matters and not feel pressured to follow every tradition or event.


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UPDATED 3:29 PM, Fri, 24 Nov 23
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